NIGERIAN YOUTH BY ERONMOSELE EMMANUEL UJIADUGHELE

Dear Nigerian Youth,

By now, you must have identified me as an abrasive, controversial, pugnacious and blunt human being. Thank you very much. Today, I want to rant. So drop that bottle in your hand, sit beside me and open your ears.

Last night, I heard you complaining bitterly. I heard you telling your mother about the terrible economy. I heard you raining curses on the leaders. I heard you bemoaning the lack of employment. I heard you whining! I felt like coming to slap you.

You've been whining since I knew you but what have you done to better your lot? All you do is sit at home and criticise the government. You have refused to work. You have refused to learn a trade. You still have a great sense of dependency. You feel people are responsible for you. Oh foolish Nigerian Youth, who has bewitched you?

I even heard you complaining that nobody is giving you any assistance. Bia, the person you're expecting help from, does he or she not have problems too? Mama even told me your uncle sent you two thousand naira. What did you do with it? One thousand naira for subscription, five hundred for ogogoro and the remaining for betting. Can you see yourself?

You say you dont want to do menial jobs, what qualification do you have? Do you remember John, the guy who lives down the street; the one everybody calls a banker? You see, John is not a banker. He leaves this street every morning wearing a nice suit. When he gets to his ''office'', he removes the suit and puts on his work clothes. Then he joins the other bricklayers in completing the day's task. What? Close your big mouth. There are many others like him here in Lagos. You see them put on suits but their work clothes are neatly tucked into the backpacks you see hanging on their shoulders.

You are unwilling to do dirty jobs because you don't want Jessica to think you aren't ''tush.'' I pity your life. You've turned down every offer so far simply because none of them ''befits'' you. You better wake up.

Oga, life is bitter-sweet. Clean money comes dirty, sometimes. As long as it's legal and on the right side of the law, don't be reluctant to get dirty! Money will not come looking for you.

All those people you depend on will soon get tired of your parasitic tendencies.

Wake up! Get out of your comfort zone! Get legally dirty. Do whatever it takes legitimately. Don't just sit home and blame the government. You are able-bodied, get on with something.

The next time I hear you complain, I will pour pepper all over you.